After The Storm
It is the middle of the night as I
sit here. The thoughts are rushing
through my mind faster than I can process them.
Another one comes right as I start to ponder the previous one. My body is exhausted. Why can’t I quiet my mind? Why do I feel so alone? No, alone is not how I am feeling. I enjoy the solitude of being alone. This is loneliness. There is a very distinct difference. When I am alone I feel at peace not just with
myself but with life. Loneliness is a
completely different feeling. It is far
from peaceful. It is an emotional horror
you can not escape. It is a darkening of
your soul. You can be lonely in a room
full of people. Dare you reach out to
them? Do they even see you there? Maybe you are as invisible as you feel. Would anyone notice if you slipped away? Would anyone care? Will it make a difference when I am gone? Will things continue on just as they are now
or will I be missed? Will someone else
feel the emptiness I now feel inside?
I notice tears streaming down my
face, unaware of when they actually began.
I am unable to stop their flow so I allow them to gently wash over my
soul, soothing and restoring like a spring rain. This is what I needed, this cleansing of pain
and hurt from my soul. I feel the
heaviness lift from my shoulders. I am
once again able to look upward and there it is, my very own rainbow with its
promise of light and beauty following the darkness of the storm.
I smile as I close my eyes and
sleep finally claims me.
Copyright 2013 by Betty Williams
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